光明山

This morning, me and my family went to 光明山 to pay respect to my eldest brother. We brought a lot of things there because Chinese New Year is coming. We got off the car at the carpark and headed for the temple. As we walked along the long, uphill pavement, the brown leaves drifted across us like droplets of rain falling down in slow motion. I could even hear the sound of the water flowing down the waterfall beside the road. Because it was so quiet there. There wasn't much people around. It is such a peaceful place.

I lighted incense and prayed to 地藏王普薩, telling him/her our purpose of coming. Then, we laid the vegetarian food, drinks and oranges nicely before the urn and placed the incense there. After that, holding a stick of incense in my hand, we headed to the top floor where his ashes were kept. I was very familiar with the place after coming so many times. Block 3... block 4...block 5 and I turned. I looked up. That was where his ashes were. My brother went to take a movable ladder and climbed up to clean away the dust as I stared motionlessly at the photo. I was overwhelmed with feelings and I could feel that my eyes were wet. I never failed to have this feeling everytime I visit him. I still miss him so much after so many years have passed. Although my memories with him is very limited, I've always wondered how my life would be if he's still around. It would be very very different. Totally different. I looked away, because I know I won't be able to hold back my tears much longer. I don't want my parents to be affected. After a while, we left. As we were walking towards the exit, my father turned over...and I could see that his eyes were red too...

With the incense still in hand, we walked down the stairs, 'leading' him to the first floor where the food was. I put the last incense in the urn and waited for him to eat finish. Then, we took the paper money, clothes etc to the fireplace to be burned. The uncle there threw all of them into the sea of fire and they vanished in the flames. Hope he can receive it.