Diary | 26 May 2012 | Saturday

Graduation Night

Ah! I am late!

I rushed up the stairs to the second floor of the alumni club house. The performance had already started. The place were filled with people. I looked around; there were some familiar faces. I smiled to them and tried to locate KA. I saw him on the left and sat down at the overcrowded table. We exchanged greetings and watched the performance on stage. After some vocal performance and the lecturers' roly poly cover (i had intuition that they are dancing this haha), the dinner started~~

The buffet was substandard...but at least the aloe vera/wolfberry drink is good. What can you expect to get for $10? The dinner lasted for a while with some chatting and interactions with my friends. After dinner we had some games before the election of the best dressed couple that day. Some of them had really interesting catwalk lol. All sort of stuffs from magic to kissing and dancing...

The best couple won probably because of their support luh. There were other couples better dressed than them. Then the event ended with a lucky draw. Pui ! Didn't win the ipad argh!

I stayed on a little longer, taking photos with friends from other tables. This is probably the last time I would see these people. After some mingling, our group left. Split ways and left. Me and some headed for SIM bus stop. We waited for a long time before 74 appeared at the end of the road.

I sat on the bus. Had some reflection.

Graduation Day

After checking that everything is done and ready, I brought all the things with me and headed for school in formal attire. 平常心。 I wasn't feeling particularly excited nor nervous. But rather happy that I could get to see my friends after such a long time. My comrades.

I met yongwen on the way and we proceeded to meet up with bentoh-san. I had them accompany me around the school doing errands for the last time. We met other friends along the way and we gathered in the library for some catch-up. Time flew and we proceeded to the reporting venue, put on our harry potter robes that we purposely came down to collect the other day, before settling down in our respective seats.

Then, began the boring wait and the boring talk. After decades, I followed the queue to the hall and sat down with people that I am not close with. Sad case. Had to watch the ceremony silently. Dad and mum reached the hall on time. I saw where they sat. There was quite a distance. And so we watched the not-so-exciting stuffs for a while. Finally, it was my turn to get on stage. It was so exciting tehehe ^^! Sooo exciting!!!! (Maybe because I was cooped up in the silent group for some time) And thanks! Thanks for the loud cheers for me hahaha!

After receiving the dummy certificate, we immediately proceeded to queue for the real thing (and also the bear ^^) before rejoining the ceremony. Cheers to all my classmates who graduated! During the valedictorian's speech, memories of these 3 years came up to my mind...Good ones, memorable ones...Hehe...It has been quite a journey. A good one though :)   Thanks to the fun times we had. If there is an OST playing during the speech, it would be more awesome! Just like the movies hah :D

After the speech, everybody went out for the photo-takingggg (best thing!). Many didn't touch the buffet (not interested), just take photo only haha! I went around taking photos/chatting with people too. EY people. Project mates. Need to thank them for this 3 years :)   A pity I didn't get to take with some people though. Spent hours there before going off to return the robes.

I'd say these photos proved that we once fought side-by-side. Years later, I would hope to see that each one of us is shinning brightly at our own path. Our own dreams.

"The challenges, the obstacles. Do not be defeated by reality.", I'd tell myself. 

My Troughs

Back when I was in secondary one, I had a psychology illness. I was afraid of going to school ever since primary school. Every school day morning, I am scared. Phobia-like nervousness before going to school, especially before afternoon classes. The kind that even thinking of the usual activities that me and best friend always do (GBA/Pokemon) before going to school, frightens me.

It worsened in secondary one. The moment I stepped out of my house, I would feel nauseous. Going to school, going to the beach, going to the mall; no exception. Everyday was a torture. Back then, what kept me going was fictitious characters (haha) from naruto, bleach, one piece, harry potter, final fantasy 10, and another one which I couldn't remember......They gave me some sort of strength and I endured this terrible illness. It lasted for months, till about the 1st/2nd term of secondary two.

Every memory of that period I try to recall is, somehow, in grey colour.

The other gloomy period was in 2010. I was dejected, stressed up and feeling despair. I was in solitude. And that was an indescribable torment. My friends are gone......Gone somewhere else, with somebody else. I am left alone here. The worst weeks: I only spoke when I was needed for projects. Other than that, no. My phone was quiet. I am by myself.

Trying to cope with school work was particularly hard in this situation. Staying back alone waiting for Jap lessons every week was hellish and I was a loner in the lessons as well. Thus, I quit after the 2nd sem because I could no longer take it.

Then one day after I somewhat got used to the solitary, I went back to listen to Yui's Life. This time with the lyrics. And I felt better. Much better. I survived by looping the song for days. The song and the singer's story motivated me. My thinking then changed. I know I cannot stay like this forever. I wanted to be like her; I resolved to improve myself no matter how tough it is! So I continued my Jap studies in the 4th semester and started learning piano around august. Gradually, things changed for the better...




YUI - LIFE (PV) from moch. agus safari on Vimeo.