匿名的好友

Cant help but feel sad every time i listen to this......

明明就

To the Field

Field camp finally came. In a flash. This is going to be a really tough week. I hope i can survive through this ordeal. I dunno. I dunno how to pull through. I dunno how to endure through this. I dunno what i can do.

Clouds, please give me strength.....

Mama

After 21 years of marriage, my wife wanted me to take another woman out to dinner and a movie. She said, “I love you, but I know this other woman loves you and would love to spend some time with you.”

The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit was my MOTHER, who has been a widow for 19 years, but the demands of my work and my three children had made it possible to visit her only occasionally

. That night I called to invite her to go out for dinner and a movie. “What’s wrong, are you well?” she asked.

My mother is the type of woman who suspects that a late night call or a surprise invitation is a sign of bad news. “I thought that it would be pleasant to spend some time with you,” I responded. “Just the two of us.” She thought about it for a moment, and then said, “I would like that very much.”

That Friday after work, as I drove over to pick her up I was a bit nervous. When I arrived at her house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be nervous about our date. She waited in the door with her coat on. She had curled her hair and was wearing the dress that she had worn to celebrate her last wedding anniversary. She smiled from a face that was as radiant as an angel’s. “I told my friends that I was going to go out with my son, and they were impressed, “she said, as she got into the car. “They can’t wait to hear about our meeting.”

We went to a restaurant that, although not elegant, was very nice and cozy. My mother took my arm as if she were the First Lady. After we sat down, I had to read the menu. Her eyes could only read large print. Half way through the entries, I lifted my eyes and saw Mom sitting there staring at me. A nostalgic smile was on her lips. “It was I who used to have to read the menu when you were small,” she said. “Then it’s time that you relax and let me return the favor,” I responded. During the dinner, we had an agreeable conversation – nothing extraordinary but catching up on recent events of each other’s life. We talked so much that we missed the movie. As we arrived at her house later, she said, “I’ll go out with you again, but only if you let me invite you.” I agreed.

“How was your dinner date?” asked my wife when I got home. “Very nice. Much more so than I could have imagined,” I answered.

A few days later, my mother died of a massive heart attack. It happened so suddenly that I didn’t have a chance to do anything for her. Some time later, I received an envelope with a copy of a restaurant receipt from the same place mother and I had dined. An attached note said: “I paid this bill in advance. I wasn’t sure that I could be there; but nevertheless, I paid for two plates – one for you and the other for your wife. You will never know what that night meant for me. I love you, son.”

Butter-Fly

Guard Duty!

I had my guard duty this week. It was suppperrr relax!!! Relax is only applicable for my shift. Only that particular shift! Well...i didn't choose it. Me and my friend let the others choose first (they keep changing their mind! *curse them*) and then we took the last available shift. Nth shift sentry at the ferry terminal. It turned out to be the best one because that shift is the only one-time shift. The first few shift personnel have to be on duty again after our shift haha! The prowlers have to do a few shifts throughout the night as well, not to mention that they have to walk around Tekong.

I had a good rest that day because i slept like 8pm till my shift. Then me and my friend guarded the ferry terminal for quite a while. At midnight, there was no one booking in or out. So it was quite an easy job. But we couldn't move around or do anything so we basically kept each other company by chatting all the way. I got praised for doing my job as well (i won't reveal much here). One of the rare things that you can be happy about in Tekong. Finally, our shift ended and we passed over to the others before heading back to sleep till 6am. Woke up for breakfast before going back to our company for another 3 hours of rest~

I think i am quite lucky because due to guard duty, i managed to skip running in the rain as well as the cadence run in the following morning. Then aqua jog was cancelled. All the activities that i detest did not happen.

I am out again! Yes i survived another week. This week was particularly slack because we have to rest well before the IPPT test. I failed again, at 2.4 run. But i can see that i had improved. 2.4km does not seem as long compared to my 1st try. I hope i can pass at the next IPPT so that i can book out early and say goodbye to the shitty aqua jog!

And some film crew came over for some filming. They borrowed one of our bunks in my company for the film set haha! And also we shouted very loudly when they were recording our physical training lol. "HALF LEFT READYYYY!!"

I think they were filming "Ah boy to men" cause the bunk look exactly like ours!!

Closer

Here's another weekend that ended in a flash. Weekend is just too short.

My knee is almost fully recovered. Still having some difficulties squatting and running. Hope i am able to run really soon. I want to pass my next IPPT! I want to book out early!!

This week's new illness is rashes or whatsoever. Red little bumps on my forearms and knees. Not sure if it is allergy or irritation but it is damn itchy! The clinic is closed today so i can't get any medication...

Life sux and i'm going to book in soon.

First Book Out

Finally I managed to get out of Tekong Island. It was really a shitty life inside. No freedom in doing anything (even drinking water). Time passed by really slowly during the first few days. It gradually improves when I got used to it la.

My appetite improves whole lot inside because we have to use a lot of energy in the activities. I craved for lunch after finishing my breakfast and started to think of dinner when I had my lunch etc. I think I've gotten fatter...

Must be because of the running and having to stand for hours during the rifle ceremony, I came back to Singapore with a limp. I have seen the MO twice and have not recovered (lousy!). I had been limping for more than a week already! I want to recover!


When I booked out, I found out that my grandpa was in the hospital. I went to visit him before going home. He grew thinner. Poor thing. I hope he recover real soon.

Will be back...definitely

Today is my last day of being a civilian. Tomorrow my status will drop to a cao recruit. Sianzz...

I will be out 2 weeks later. So bye~~



Oh and i won't be bringing my iPhone. So i would be missing it and the apps like crazy :(

Bye bye phone!

Clouds

I just realized i'm a cloud person haha ^^

 

I finished my dinner and so i waited for the others to finish too. Bla bla bla then i checked for my wallet. Oh no! It's not there. Even my phone too. Where is it? GG! Not on the floor. Not on the table. I scoured the whole food court for my belongings. And then i saw them, at one of the counter. Must have been looted gg!

I looked inside my wallet. Money gone. Card gone. The thief must have ran away with them. Damn! What to do? Police? This is the worst thing that could ever happen to me!!! Please let this be a dream! Please! Argghhh ...And then i woke up...

Hiatus

Tomorrow I will be having my last music lesson. Due to enlistment, i have to stop for now. The plan is to continue after BMT which would be next year. But i hate it. I don't like the idea of not practicing for so such a long period. I don't want my passion to gradually lessen. Don't want.

吻下去爱上你

Haha he is so funny. Hope he doesn't retire.

Revving Up

I was still so nervous yesterday, making mistakes that i shouldn't at the circuit. But unlike the other times that i failed, today i've got a feeling that i'm going to do it right. During the warm-up lesson before the test, my instructor brought me to one test route that i didn't went before (or i had forgotten). I was warned of the few traps in that route. I had a good feeling back then.

After we had one last run in the circuit, i sat in that accursed waiting room again. 心如止水, i had to keep myself calm. Finally my tester came and we proceeded to the car. (Damn! He walked like a snail.) We passed by instructor. He saw the tester and gave me some signal. He seems to be mouthing the word "凶". Gone case man.

The whole circuit was like walking on thin ice. Intimidating. I would never want to go through this again. After getting out of circuit, he began to make things difficult for me. Never say "turn left" just admit it like a man. Don't lie that you did and blame me. Trick me some more huh. Purposely wait till i painstakingly kept left then tell me to do an u-turn. Fine but don't reprimand me for not choosing my lane in advance!

There were lots of cars then and they were fast. I had to change like 2/3 lanes in order to do that u-turn. Impossible! There were already more than 10 cars queuing there! I lost my chance to get in. I had to stop. And there goes 8 points.

So the tester told me to go forward. 阴差阳错 we went to the route my instructor brought me this morning and hah i avoided the traps altogether.

Droplets of perspiration dripping down. Big droplets.

Seeing that we were proceeding back to the test center and i still haven't done an u-turn, i thought i failed. I followed him to the office. (Ma de walk faster la!) And he reprimanded me. How could i have made a decision myself to go straight when you told me to do an u-turn hello??

But i passed la. Nevermind.

When i just got out, i met Junwen who was applying his pdl. What a coincidence lol. We had a good chat while we wait for the long queue at the office.

After getting the license, things seem somewhat completed. I sent a thank you message to my instructor before going home.

After having so many lessons, i think i am more ready for the road. Hearing many stories about one-time-passed drivers getting into accidents, i feel that me having so many lessons might not be a bad thing after all.

It's really windy these days. Very peaceful. Except for the National Day jet planes that keep flying past here.

From my window~

I hope they would never build something on this serene field. Please do not obstruct my wind and view haaha!

To Zanarkand

This music is just so awesome to me that i have to post it again. It brings back so much memories every time i listen to this.

Recently, i feel like learning some string instruments. And like piano, i would like this piece of music to be the first one i learn on the new instrument!

I hope to visit zanarkand if that place really exists.

Which way?

I have been standing at this crossroad for a long time. I told myself to use these months to mull over which path to take. But i realized, i had been avoiding the question. I still do not have the answer yet.

When i saw some people studying really hard, i began to think. "Is this really what they want?" "Is this necessary?"

People study relentlessly for countless nights in order to get good results for uni admission. When you do get it, what do you do next? Do you know what you want to be in the future? Are you studying rigorously because you know that's the way to your goal or because others said that you have to? For me, i didn't know. I didn't know what i could be in the future when i picked accountancy. I...just study hard...

Things are different after secondary school. You have to choose your path back then already. I am faced with this dilemma now. I don't know if i should continue walking into this path right in front of me, or should i take the one at the side where i can be much happier. Where my passion lies......

A Stirring Story

I walked into Popular book store and the first thing i saw was this:

那些年，我们一起追的女孩

So i decided to buy it haha ^^ (since i had read the incomplete version on the free app) It is interesting and inspiring :) This is one of the few books that i actually buy in my life. Probably the first chinese novel. I'm going to treasure it!

It comes with a poster too! My first poster lol! Before i get my hands on Snsd's or T-ara's??? Nvm i'm going to put it on my wall soon hah.

The Separated Piece of Cloud

One day

This monster suddenly appeared beside the basin.

It startled me!

I think this little cloud landed here because it got separated from the rest of the clouds in the sky.

Poor thing...

His friends must be missing him.

My Vacation

What am i doing now? No, not working. I have many things to do so i'm not working yet. On normal days, i would spend the day with piano practices, korean lessons and some physical training. I would be left with about 4 hours of free time in between whereby i rest and do other activities like erm reading about music compositions..., learning to write with my right hand..., posture correcting exercises..., clearing outstanding tasks..., watching/reading dramas/books and many other things. So so so many things that i want to do. Time is not enough.

Some suggest that i get a part time job. Hmm...i would have to sacrifice a lot of things then. Assuming i get back home at 6pm plus, i rest a while, bathe, and then get out to eat. Earliest i get home after that would be 9. Practicing piano would be disturbing neighbor's sleep. Practicing in the weekend is just not enough. And i would probably have no more energy to study korean in the night. Driving lessons have to be sacrificed too in exchange for the meager pay of a part time job. I don't think it is worth it.

I like how it is now.

Diary | 26 May 2012 | Saturday

Graduation Night

Ah! I am late!

I rushed up the stairs to the second floor of the alumni club house. The performance had already started. The place were filled with people. I looked around; there were some familiar faces. I smiled to them and tried to locate KA. I saw him on the left and sat down at the overcrowded table. We exchanged greetings and watched the performance on stage. After some vocal performance and the lecturers' roly poly cover (i had intuition that they are dancing this haha), the dinner started~~

The buffet was substandard...but at least the aloe vera/wolfberry drink is good. What can you expect to get for $10? The dinner lasted for a while with some chatting and interactions with my friends. After dinner we had some games before the election of the best dressed couple that day. Some of them had really interesting catwalk lol. All sort of stuffs from magic to kissing and dancing...

The best couple won probably because of their support luh. There were other couples better dressed than them. Then the event ended with a lucky draw. Pui ! Didn't win the ipad argh!

I stayed on a little longer, taking photos with friends from other tables. This is probably the last time I would see these people. After some mingling, our group left. Split ways and left. Me and some headed for SIM bus stop. We waited for a long time before 74 appeared at the end of the road.

I sat on the bus. Had some reflection.

Graduation Day

After checking that everything is done and ready, I brought all the things with me and headed for school in formal attire. 平常心。 I wasn't feeling particularly excited nor nervous. But rather happy that I could get to see my friends after such a long time. My comrades.

I met yongwen on the way and we proceeded to meet up with bentoh-san. I had them accompany me around the school doing errands for the last time. We met other friends along the way and we gathered in the library for some catch-up. Time flew and we proceeded to the reporting venue, put on our harry potter robes that we purposely came down to collect the other day, before settling down in our respective seats.

Then, began the boring wait and the boring talk. After decades, I followed the queue to the hall and sat down with people that I am not close with. Sad case. Had to watch the ceremony silently. Dad and mum reached the hall on time. I saw where they sat. There was quite a distance. And so we watched the not-so-exciting stuffs for a while. Finally, it was my turn to get on stage. It was so exciting tehehe ^^! Sooo exciting!!!! (Maybe because I was cooped up in the silent group for some time) And thanks! Thanks for the loud cheers for me hahaha!

After receiving the dummy certificate, we immediately proceeded to queue for the real thing (and also the bear ^^) before rejoining the ceremony. Cheers to all my classmates who graduated! During the valedictorian's speech, memories of these 3 years came up to my mind...Good ones, memorable ones...Hehe...It has been quite a journey. A good one though :)   Thanks to the fun times we had. If there is an OST playing during the speech, it would be more awesome! Just like the movies hah :D

After the speech, everybody went out for the photo-takingggg (best thing!). Many didn't touch the buffet (not interested), just take photo only haha! I went around taking photos/chatting with people too. EY people. Project mates. Need to thank them for this 3 years :)   A pity I didn't get to take with some people though. Spent hours there before going off to return the robes.

I'd say these photos proved that we once fought side-by-side. Years later, I would hope to see that each one of us is shinning brightly at our own path. Our own dreams.

"The challenges, the obstacles. Do not be defeated by reality.", I'd tell myself. 

My Troughs

Back when I was in secondary one, I had a psychology illness. I was afraid of going to school ever since primary school. Every school day morning, I am scared. Phobia-like nervousness before going to school, especially before afternoon classes. The kind that even thinking of the usual activities that me and best friend always do (GBA/Pokemon) before going to school, frightens me.

It worsened in secondary one. The moment I stepped out of my house, I would feel nauseous. Going to school, going to the beach, going to the mall; no exception. Everyday was a torture. Back then, what kept me going was fictitious characters (haha) from naruto, bleach, one piece, harry potter, final fantasy 10, and another one which I couldn't remember......They gave me some sort of strength and I endured this terrible illness. It lasted for months, till about the 1st/2nd term of secondary two.

Every memory of that period I try to recall is, somehow, in grey colour.

The other gloomy period was in 2010. I was dejected, stressed up and feeling despair. I was in solitude. And that was an indescribable torment. My friends are gone......Gone somewhere else, with somebody else. I am left alone here. The worst weeks: I only spoke when I was needed for projects. Other than that, no. My phone was quiet. I am by myself.

Trying to cope with school work was particularly hard in this situation. Staying back alone waiting for Jap lessons every week was hellish and I was a loner in the lessons as well. Thus, I quit after the 2nd sem because I could no longer take it.

Then one day after I somewhat got used to the solitary, I went back to listen to Yui's Life. This time with the lyrics. And I felt better. Much better. I survived by looping the song for days. The song and the singer's story motivated me. My thinking then changed. I know I cannot stay like this forever. I wanted to be like her; I resolved to improve myself no matter how tough it is! So I continued my Jap studies in the 4th semester and started learning piano around august. Gradually, things changed for the better...




YUI - LIFE (PV) from moch. agus safari on Vimeo.

Poly Graduation

Going back

It was midnight and mom came into my room. We began to reminisce about the past. My primary school life. Toddler moments. And also him. Things about him that i didn't know, didn't heard of.

I couldn't sleep later that night. Certain images and events keep flashing across my mind. If only we could time travel back to the past. Then i would go all the way back. And be really diligent, learn lots of thing. And perhaps when that fateful day arrives, i could have ask him why is he going out. Where...and how.

I would have warn him...stopped him from going to the pizza shop. Stopped him from running. Stopped him from leaving the house...

By now, if lucky i could have a nephew huh? ^^ It would definitely be livelier! Things would be so different!

:) but oh well......

Diary | 15 Apr 2012 | Sunday

Had 3 luxurious dinners in a row. We went to jalan kayu in the evening. Had not been there for ages. It had changed somewhat. The sound of walking on stone pebbles reminds me of Kahang hah! We entered a western restaurant in this village-like area. We ordered stuffs but wow it was damn expensive! But the servings were large and delicious. Hundred plus in total for the 4 of us......Nevermind it was good though :)

Diary | 14 Apr 2012 | Saturday

Yohoho Today I went to Nex to have an early birthday celebration. Settled in for a japanese soba restaurant. I didn't know that soba refers to buckwheat noodles actually -.-   Everything in the menu is sobasss. But okay, it's not those chinese noodles. The meal doesn't taste bad :)   After the meal, they brought in the cake. Woa I didn't expect one. I'm so old already ^^

I got a nice gift (thanks!), ate the cake and spent some time chatting in the restaurant. I got out of the restaurant lightheartedly and we walked around the mall for a while before heading home :)

Diary | 13 Apr 2012 | Friday

We went to clarke quay for dinner. A japanese bbq restaurant, Aburiya. It was early evening so there wasn't much people at that moment. We ordered quite a lot of things, beef, porks and bacons, lamb, prawns, corns, mushrooms, kimchi?, bibimbap?, salad and many thing else. Their unique sauce makes the food delicious and the aromatic taste distinguishes itself from the other restaurants *yum yum*

Because of connections, every plate has extra extra servings :)   Yet because of that, the five of us could not finish everything. We sat there for a long time, trying our best, till the restaurant was bustling with people. I think we were the only table that was overwhelmed with food hah! I got really bored and tried to make my own food again :D   I suggested frying the salad in the aluminum, adding salt and garlic etc. It was fun ^^   As a result, the vegetables shrunk and we finished it instantly haha! Nevertheless, there were many leftover meats and we let the staffs benefit from it.

Though full we were, we still had space for desert in the end. The ice-creams cooled me down from the heat of the fire. Awesomess. The whole dinner was actually cost around $250 i think. Got discounted to $160 ^^
It was great!!

Went to have a drink after dinner. Hmmm......we went to one at the rooftop and chose a seat near the edge for the view. A pity there was no wind this time round. I forgot what i drank the last time so i picked a glass of white wine. Erm it taste good at first but after that...i would still prefer red wine ^^

I don't think i had too much but my whole face was shinning like a red lantern when we left. I scared myself when i saw my bloodshot eyes in the reflections.

I was really tired when we board the train. It was midnight soon. Making thing worse i had to stand. As usual, extreme fatigue and train makes me real uncomfortable. So i alighted earlier for a place to vomit.

That feeling suxs...

曾沛慈

A 曾沛慈 exact replica. But he is a guy D:


My very second song that i learnt to play. The song still feels so sad :(

孤星...

其实我亦有心事  你不会知

我猜

Something funny to keep me alive during the bad times.

明知我爱你

Junk

Hearing their straight As and distinctions make me feel damn worthless. Those are the results that i didn't manage to achieve in my life.

Not getting enlightened earlier is my biggest regret.

Now i am a useless scrap with diminishing hope of getting into a Uni.

My life is in the middle of nowhere, with nothing in hand.

I don't know how to move on...

Z213071

Passed these few days with a blurry state of mind. Fever, burning eyes, running blocked nose, painful pimples/ulcers and insects bites all over me. I think the damn bugs brought me some virus which causes infection because the vampire-like bite marks on my calf is turning dark red. Couldn't sleep well.

My brother had been overseas. Yesterday, i got dragged by father to rescue his car because the battery's dead when it wasn't warmed up for some time. Halfway through all the futile attempts, i noticed bloods on my foot. Lots of blood. Dripping. I hid it from dad before going home to tend my wounds. All the movements must have tore open my wounds i guess. Later that day, every movement i made hurts.

Nevertheless, i went to Suntec this morning for Grade 3 theory test (with a limp though). Those happy kids must be wondering what this lame uncle is doing at this place. The paper was quite easy la! I was carrying a fever after all leh. I limp back after that...

Z213031

I finally mailed out my application for SMU university today :)   It had been burdening me for ages...ermmm...ya i went back to school yesterday to get my testimonials from Ms Phoon and Yoko sensei. I had a nice catch-up with them......It was a wonderful feeling :)   But i don't know if we have a chance to meet again. I miss the school, the people, the place. I felt nostalgic and reluctant to leave school yesterday. I know i don't have much chance to get back to this place again......

I just wrote a thank-you note to these two teachers. It wasn't easy trying to write everything in Japanese to Yoko sensei so i wrote it with a mixture of languages. Kinda glad to be their students and grateful for their teachings :)   Also grateful to the other good teachers as well.

Thank you for everything :)

On the other hand, my illness seems to be recovering after so many weeks. I hope i will fully recover soon...
I shall spend the rest of my time studying for music theory exam this saturday.

:(

Something to Ponder about

If you woke up this morning with more health than illness...

You are more blessed than the million who will not survive this week.

If you have never experienced the danger of battle, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation ... 

You are ahead of 500 million people in the world.

If you can attend a meeting without fear of harassment, arrest, torture, or death...

You are more blessed than three billion people in the world.

If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof overhead and a place to sleep...

You are richer than 75% of this world.

If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a dish someplace ... 

You are among the top 8% of the world's wealthy.

If your parents are still alive and still married ... 

You are very rare, even in the United States and Canada.

If you can read this webpage, you are more blessed than over two billion people in the world that cannot read at all.

Take nothing for granted.

旅行的意义

Diary | 3 Feb 2012 | Friday

This week was the toughest week of the whole internship. Everything was very difficult to do. But i'm glad that it is over now. Managed to finish everything around four and rush for the speech contest at 4.30pm. Was a bit late but never mind. I am presenting last. I am super happy that i said out my speech without mistake and much hesitation. Did not even performed that well during my thousandth rehearsal. And in the end, because i did not use any written notes for my speech, i received praises for my memory tehehe ^^

After the contest, we mingled around with the Japanese students and had some refreshments. Then the award ceremony began. But i didn't really care much and went to the toilet (lol). When i was done, my sensei saw me coming back and opened the door quickly. And she was like: "There he is!". I was surprised when i was told that i won the third prize. Everybody was looking at me and clapping when the door just opened. Omg!! Ahahahaha!! So fortunate ~. I think i let out a really shock expression for everybody to see hah!

After that, everyone received an envelope that contains comments from the Japanese students as well as our fellow classmates. I got mine too. Though i couldn't decipher the difficult comments by the foreign students, i can understand the easier ones from my classmates. The warm-hearted wishes made me smile from the bottom of my heart. I realized that this was the last assessment/event relating to Japanese for the 3 years of poly life. After today, there probably won't be much chance for me to cross path with Japanese or these classmates again. Feeling a little sad. Though i did not really interact with others except for Bentoh in class, i am beginning to feel reluctant towards leaving these bunch of people.

The prizes and everything i've received from the class this year

After everything ended, i met up with some fellow interns who happened to be in school. We went to eat at a market nearby the school. Then we stayed there and chatted for a long time. Time flies really fast and internship is about to end. But i couldn't wait. So do they ahahaha!! ...... Hmm on the other hand, this also means that everybody would be going separate ways, doesn't it?

Doctor

A doctor entered the hospital in hurry after being called in for an urgent surgery. He answered the call ASAP, changed his clothes and went directly to the surgery block.
 
He found the boy’s father going and coming in the hall waiting for the doctor. Once seeing him, the dad yelled:
“Why did you take all this time to come? Don’t you know that my son’s life is in danger? Don’t you have the sense of responsibility?”

The doctor smiled and said:
“I am sorry, I wasn’t in the hospital and I came the fastest I could after receiving the call…… And now, I wish you’d calm down so that I can do my work”

“Calm down?! What if your son was in this room right now, would you calm down? If your own son dies now what will you do??” said the father angrily

The doctor smiled again and replied: “I will say what Job said in the Holy Bible “From dust we came and to dust we return, blessed be the name of God”. Doctors cannot prolong lives. Go and intercede for your son, we will do our best by God’s grace”

“Giving advice when we’re not concerned is so easy” Murmured the father.

The surgery took some hours after which the doctor went out happy, “Thank God! Your son is saved!”

And without waiting for the father’s reply he carried on his way running. “If you have any question, ask the nurse!!”

“Why is he so arrogant? He couldn’t wait some minutes so that I ask about my son’s state” Commented the father when seeing the nurse minutes after the doctor left.

The nurse answered, tears coming down her face: “His son died yesterday in a road accident, he was in the burial when we called him for your son’s surgery. And now that he saved your son’s life, he left running to finish his son’s burial.”

To Zanarkand

Brings back memories

如果你也聽說

Hello...you there? How have you been? Hope it's fine over there. It sux here lately. Things haven't been moving smoothly. I feel like giving up and quitting this job at certain times. Report would be due soon. Haven't felt this stressed for a long time and it surely doesn't feel good at all. I have a feeling that I would not be able to meet the deadline all these. Too much things to do in such a short time...

Can I don't wake up tomorrow?

Thanks...

Today. I was on my way to work like usual. Leaving for work slightly earlier, I stopped by at Compass Point to take the train. Then I walked down the escalator, checking my items on the way. My wallet, phone keys and ear piece are with me as always. Reaching the platform, I imagined how it's going to be like in the new client's place. Working on my laptop all the way. Hmm? Laptop? What the CRAP?!

I took it home yesterday and thought that it was still at my working place. Idiot. How can I forget? It's going to take some time to retrieve it but I can't work without it. Damn! I can't be late today especially. Thinking that I'm screwed this time, I got out of the station is an instant, with my phone out. I can only think of one person. My mom.

I called her, hoping that she was at home, and yes! She is. Without saying much, she agreed to bring my bag over to me immediately. As I was waiting for her, I looked in the direction of my house, where mom would be. I was experiencing a mixture of feelings then. A mixture of......probably ashamed and grateful. Ashamed, because if it was me, I would have hesitated to dropped whatever I'm doing to deliver a bag. I would have complained over the phone. But I am thankful. Thankful to have such a mom who places me at the first place.

The breeze blew against me as I was immersed in deep thoughts. After a while, she appeared in my sight, riding a bicycle, carrying my heavy bag.

She handed my bag over to me, " 快吗? "

:) ......

I want to treat her better...

2012

Another year has passed.

I am hearing people coming up with new year resolution and things that they would want to do in this brand new year. But i don't. I guess i didn't fraction my life into calender periods. Things just move on as usual as the clock strikes 12. The earth still spins. Unhappy things still occupy my mind. The phone rings with wishes of the new year yet i feel like ignoring it. I'm feeling so tired. Tired of everything. I want to stop struggling with school, with work, and with my life. I'm lost and aimless right now. I lost sight of whatever i have been fighting for.

Overcoming obstacles unaccompanied is tough. But i will try to hang on. I will be able to do it, wouldn't i? Dear clouds...you would imbue me with strength, will'ya?......

Right now i just need some quiet space